Step Stones For Life® Blog » Depression

Hope

Nova Reed — Mon, 07 Nov 2011 04:43:06 +0000

The warrior against despair is Hope.

The light at the end of heartache is Hope.

The vehicle that moves you from being stuck in unhappiness to joy is Hope.

The first step to creating your ideal life is to simply find Hope. – Nova

Emotional Presence – BE Inspiration

Nova Reed — Sat, 05 Feb 2011 17:58:25 +0000

Maintaining emotional presence allows you to push away regrets from the past and avoid anxieties of the future. Learning to remain emotionally present requires trust. Trust in your abilities and your path; a deep self-knowledge of your purpose and meaning. A knowing of why you are here. If you live in a place of trust, rather than hearing regrets of the past, you will peer back at your journey and notice accomplishments. You will look ahead and see faith. Emotional presence is a celebration of life, self-awareness, and gratitude. With emotional presence you can trust to be completely in the present and enjoy every sense of your being aligning with the energy of creation, the beauty of life, and create inspiring wonders in your everyday world.

The Five Stages Of Grief

Nova Reed — Sun, 18 Oct 2009 22:19:40 +0000

When you are dealing with the loss of a loved one emotions can come in waves. One moment you think you are fine, the next you are sobbing, angry and devastated. Taking time to understand your feelings and the stages of grief will help you cope, celebrate treasured memories, and move forward with life.

The Five Stages of Grief:

1. Denial
Shock and disbelief. You can’t believe they are gone. Are you sure? Is a typical question, needing to see or hear for yourself. This stage may last a few moments, days, or more.

2. Anger
Why did you leave me?! Hurt, feelings of abandonment, injustice, and loss surface. Anger may be directed toward the deceased, the world, or even yourself.

3. Bargaining
If I had only…thoughts circulate in your mind. This loss hurts, how could I have prevented this pain?

4. Depression
Feelings of numbness, inward anger, and intense sadness.

5. Acceptance
The dark cloud of anger, intense sadness and mourning begins to lift. The loss seems real, undeniable, and nonnegotiable.

There are many strong and uncomfortable feelings associated with grief. You may feel anger, abandonment, fear, guilt, and depression. Facing these intense emotions can be very difficult. Failing to work trough the five stages of grief is actually more stressful and strenuous on your body, mind, and spirit. The best way to work through grief is to face your feelings, do not try to hide how you feel, let it out. Healing will take place when you allow yourself to move through your feelings and all the stages of grief.

Reach out for support, get enough hugs, and know you are cared for.

With Care,

Life Coach Nova

Giving Thanks

Nova Reed — Sun, 18 Oct 2009 21:53:40 +0000

Though the holiday season is thought to be a joyous time by all, many find the time between Thanksgiving and Christmas to be stressful and emotional. As a helping professional, I have observed the approaching holiday season as both a joyous time, as well as a time filled with heartache and family conflict.

Mild depression seems to permeate much of our society as we struggle to fulfill multiple roles, strive for perfection, and bury the pain of the past. The holidays often surface emotions from the past with greater intensity. Unresolved conflict, hurt, and past regrets are heightened with the impending marker representing the approaching end of the New Year. Maybe goals were unfulfilled, or relationships came to an end, or a loved one passed away, or a deep family conflict remains an open wound. Many report to me that the pain can become unbearable, the sorrow of a missed loved one seems inescapable, or the motivation to get along with a particular family member for one meal seems just too much.

This holiday season, focus on one word to pull you toward happiness, fulfillment, and contentment: HOPE. There is always HOPE. Hope surfaces faith, love, joy, and the beauty in all of us to turn to others and GIVE. The act of giving thanks pushes away pain, hurt, and isolation.

The Thanksgiving holiday provides us with the opportunity to pause, reflect on our blessings, and proclaim our gratitude. The very act of saying grace, thanking God for our gifts, our food, our family, friends, and health serves us in so many ways. Gratitude, as I have written before, happens to be the exact opposite of depression. When you are grateful, you are not depressed. Gratitude also exists in the present. In the present you can feel joy, elation, and peace.

Follow this simple exercise to prepare your heart to take in all the joy around you this holiday season:

With the knowing that we are all connected in harmony through the unison of Thanksgiving, and that many before us sacrificed to give us the life we have now, give thanks and express your gratitude…

1. Write down 10 things you are most grateful for today. Read them over. Your heart will fill with gratitude, bring you to the present, and pull the giving trait we all have to share your blessings with others.

2. On 10 notes write “I am grateful for you.” And personally hand them (or if not possible mail them) to the 10 most important people in your life. A bonus would be to include a positive affirmation about each person that you find endearing. Such as, “I am grateful for you. You are a great listener.” – What a beautiful gift for the thanksgiving table to leave place cards for your family proclaiming your gratitude!

Grieving can take on new pain over the holidays:
Knowing that a very important person may include the memory of a loved one, write down your gratitude for them and place the note in a photo album or next to a picture of them. By embracing gratitude for the beautiful memories you have, you are holding their spirit close and honoring every piece of their life.

3. Do the one thing you enjoy the most this holiday. Take time to nurture yourself. You will have more energy to give, resentment will diminish, and you will take in the good in everyone. Everyone seems more pleasant when you are relaxed!

And finally, center yourself with this thought;

Gratitude, the act of giving thanks, pulls me closer to others, to creation, to hope, and to love.

Give thanks this Thanksgiving!

Happy Thanksgiving with all the trimmings.

All my best,

Life Coach Nova

Email: Nova@StepStonesForLife.com

Or call: 949.858.2442

I am always here for you.

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